Where There’s a Will There’s a Way
Cape Super Moms put out a call for posts from our Super Dads out there! Enjoy this post by our first contributor, Will Black, who is also a Cape Ann resident!
Being an adult, husband and a dad is great. Really great and really tough. The responsibility of owning a house, being married and contributing to society is wild. And tough. The small reminders of why I subscribed to this life long grind and its outcomes by far outweigh the daily exhaustions and multiple frustrations I feel. I mean, I get to wake up to three little people that I made and see their love and smiles every morning. When I get home from work its their stories from school or the jokes they heard on the bus that really make my day. I would never give that up or exchange my life for any other.
That being said…..
Every so often I go through moments in my life where I need to prove to myself that I am still me, Will, an individual and not just a provider for others. Simply not an organic robot going through the motions of life. I need reminding that I am in control of my own body and mind. Not just a living being going through the typical motions to satisfy a white collar model; working, feeding children and driving everyone I know around Cape Ann seven days a week. These moments of reflection, enlightenment and strange knee jerk changes have only occured on the rarest of occasions but each time have helped strengthen me both physically and mentally.
The first time was when I started college as a fresh faced 18 year old. I had been graciously given all the help in the world by my parents throughout my youth and I literally had no idea how to be an adult and how to take control of my own life. That’s why within one month of being in school decided to join the Sky Diving team. What better way to take responsibility of one’s self, then to learn how to jump out of a plane at 8000 ft, open a parachute and land it successfully on a giant X on the ground?
I spent many weekend hours in an old aircraft hangar studying as hard as I had before because I knew the exam at the end had a one very important outcome. Survival. I made that first jump as a solo jumper after 24 class hours and subsequently jumped many times out of many planes all by myself. I was a big boy now! I could finally say I was responsible for my own actions and could control my own destiny, even if my roommates thought I was going crazy!
17 years down the road and I found myself at a similar junction. It was last Fall and I was in a rut at work and the nights were getting shorter. The girls’ dance had just turned towards competition season and I was yet again becoming known as dad, the glorified taxi driver and personal chef. I needed something else to do to prove I was still Will. It all began with a text from my running buddy who asked me if I’d train and run a marathon with her in the Spring. Shalane Flanagan had just won the NYC marathon and running was all the buzz in Massachusetts. My friend had been bitten by the running bug and wanted to infect me too. I had never ran further than 10 miles in my life but at that moment as my phone buzzed among the ballet shoes and pizza sauce on the kitchen counter, I felt compelled to be Will again. I impulsively sent the thumbs up emoji back to her. And in one text, I was running a marathon. And that was that, the beginning of my next Will moment. This time round I have to credit my wife Amanda for being there and supporting me throughout the training period as my runs get longer and longer. She’s so selfless and allows me to challenge myself in such crazy ways.
My Will moments have evolved to a collaborative venture and that's fine because my life has evolved too. It’s not as simple as signing up to go skydiving in the Student Bar on a bleak Tuesday night in 2001! The process of how you execute your ‘me’ moments may change (I had to have open conversations with Amanda about such a huge commitment before registering for the race), heck life changes, but finding time to dive in and have some me moments is a very powerful tool in remembering who you are and what you can do.
By the way, please remind me of this on race day!
Will
