How to Discover and Celebrate Your Gifts

When my triplets were babies, and napping two times a day, I used to write and blog about our adventures together. (You’re welcome to peruse the archives here.) Writing has always been a balm for a my busy brain and putting words to my new momma stress made the days a little less jarring.

I had no shortage of material with this ragamuffin crew.

Years ago, we had a friend visiting that we had not seen in a while and he mentioned that he had read my blog and really enjoyed it.

“Thanks!” I said, “That means a lot!”

“You’re a really talented writer,” he said.

“That’s nice to say, thank you, I enjoy doing it. It’s a great outlet and a fun way to chronicle my tiny team.”

“Yeah, you sure did miss your calling, huh?”

Wait. Whuuu? I’m sorry, what? He was implying that because I was not a full-time, getting paid to write writer at that very moment, the ripe old age of 31, that I had missed out on an opportunity to BE a paid writer and have a writing career.

I just sort of blankly nodded. What do you say to someone who has that mindset? YOU NEVER MISS YOUR CALLING. Ever.

Life is unpredictable and if you start putting any kind of limits on what you can and can’t do, well we never would’ve seen Michael Jordan play baseball! Okay, weak example. But I do have a favorite one I read about a few years ago.

Elizabeth Gilbert shared a story in Big Magic (a book I talk about way too much) about a woman she met who was 90 years old. This elderly woman got curious one day and wanted to know everything about ancient Mesopotamia, so she read books and articles and research papers, went on archeological digs and did everything she could to learn about this ancient civilization for 10 years. (This curiosity seized her at the spry age of 80.)

She became such an expert that she became an ACTUAL expert that scholars and the academic world would reference and use her knowledge and research. I love this story because it’s a perfect example of never ever missing your calling, whether you’re 30 or 80.

This idea of discovering one’s gifts was brought up to me by a dear friend, who I happen to know started her current career when she was 50 years old. This was inspiring to see. I know most people might think they have one shot, during those college age years to discover what you want to be when you grow up, get the education to support that dream, and then spend the rest of your life doing that thing. I am hear to say, NOPE. Big fat nope on that.

I know a very talented artist who didn’t start his life as an artist. He had a very different career when his dad was diagnosed with cancer and he began painting at the hospital while he was accompanying his dad for treatments. He now owns a lovely art studio where he sells his paintings and he also runs a non-profit dedicated to funding cancer research.

Before I was a mother, I did a lot of random jobs. I worked in hospice, I worked in sales, I worked in the restaurant industry, I didn’t exactly specialize in one career field. And even now, I’ve dabbled in a little bit of everything.

I volunteer in my community, I have a few part-time gigs with fitness classes, publishing, writing. I’ve never been one to have that clear path of what I do in front of me, but one thing I try to do is be open to where the universe wants my gifts and talents. The last few years I have been drawn to the field of spiritual health and healing and am still trying to figure out what kind of role God has in mind for me down that path.

At times I feel like a bag of mixed nuts. (Salty, of course.) But when I step back and see when I have used my gifts, like empathy and nurturing when I was in hospice or connecting and motivating when I was in sales, and of course creativity and freeeeedom of expression whenever I want, I have been happy. I am not perfect at this, but I will share a few things that have helped me stay fulfilled despite no career path or legacy to speak of. (Yet. There’s still my own ancient Mesopotamia to conquer.)

Your Gifts are Meant to Help Others

This is something I have witnessed first hand. One of my dear friends has the most amazing talent to turn a cluttered, messy room into a shiny space of cleanliness and comfort. It is a real, God given super power. She used to joke to me that when someone is in a crisis, she’s good at showing up to clean toilets. I try to shut that talk down immediately. Because listen, I was a direct recipient of her clean bathrooms and shiny floors when I slogging home from the NICU for 3 months all those years ago. It was not a small thing. Her gift was precious to me. I’ve seen her do it countless times both in a crisis and on a regular old Sunday afternoon. Her Mary Poppins power makes me feel warm and fuzzy and loved. I can’t explain her magic, but it’s real. Never discount your own “menial” superpowers. Light them up, put them under a magnifying glass. Others will benefit.

Did not go to school for fitness. I had no idea coaching CrossFit would be in my wheelhouse, but I love it and definitely count this part of my life as a gift I share!

Lean In To What Brings You Joy

Let’s say you’re a spring chicken. Or you’re middle age. Or, sliiightly past middle age. You are young, old, in between, whatever. You don’t know what your gifts and talents are. You’re average at a bunch of stuff, but not exactly sure you can call any of what you do a “gift.” Don’t panic. You have time.

This kid IS a gift and a deep joy. He’s helped me hone many hidden talents.

Simply start to follow your joy. I heard this succinct and perfect phrase once and it has guided me through choices of “what do I do.” Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths and think about all the things that truly bring you joy.

It may take a few attempts and some creative thinking and maybe even a brainstorming session with yourself, but if you are walking down that path that makes you smile and makes you feel light, you will know what kind of unique talents you can turn up the volume on and share with the world. Maybe your talents are many and you KNOW what’s up, but your resource of time is short. Follow your joy, friend. Follow your joy.

Ditch Your Fear

I firmly believe that fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of public shame and humiliation is the biggest reason we keep our gifts and talents to ourselves. Fear is a liar. Fear will tell you that you aren’t good enough, qualified enough, have enough certificates or any other kind of verification. Or you have this crazy idea that EVERYONE needs to approve or like what you are doing. Again, nope. You are good enough and forget the approval of the masses, never going to happen.

As I write this, I have unfinished stories stashed all over my house in hard drives and folders in corners of closets that are victims of this giant F word. I need to dust some of these off and be an example of just putting myself out there more often. Fear almost stopped me from writing this post, because what do I know about discovering and celebrating gifts? I was asked to write about this and almost didn’t. But I dug in, used my brain, scanned my past and realized, yup, I am qualified. And so are you. So go for it.

We all have talents and gifts that make us unique. These gifts are a custom tailored package from the creator. Some we’ve always known about, and maybe some gifts are yet to be discovered.

I know there are artists and writers and future scientists and authors and talk show hosts and style icons and life coaches and bakers and travelers, both current and yet to be, and every imaginable kind of good human who might be reading this who has something wonderful to offer the world. Your gifts matter.

You are enough and I believe in you. Show us what you got.